Chapter Twenty Five

Rose lay on her stomach on her bed, relaxing when she heard a knock on her door.

"Come in," she called out.

She turned over and saw Jack enter holding a clipboard and a pen.

"What's this?" she said, pointing to it.

"The boss asked me to conduct a short survey. It's something all companions must do," Jack said.

Rose gave him a wary look.

"So why isn't he in here doing it?" she asked.

"Busy flying the TARDIS. So can you indulge me so he doesn't yell at me?" Jack said.

Rose shrugged and told him to get on with it. Jack pulled a wooden chair over to the bed and sat down.

"Okay, question number one, how long have you traveled with the Doctor?"

"Um…about…a year and a half," Rose said. "I think. It's hard to tell time inside the TARDIS."

"Did you find your time with the Doctor satisfactory?" Jack said after writing her answer down.

"Yes, mostly," Rose said.

"What things would you change about your time traveling with the Doctor?" Jack said.

"Well, the enormous amount of deaths. I'd love to change that," Rose said while Jack wrote. "Being tortured and hunted and nearly killed, I'd like to eliminate that. Apart from that, nothing."

"Do you find this current incarnation of the Doctor pleasing?" Jack said.

"Well, when he's not off being barmy and making me do stupid crap with him, yeah, he's pleasing to me," Rose said.

"Do you enjoy his scarf?"

Rose frowned.

"Scarf? What scarf?" Rose said.

"Don't know but do you enjoy it?"

"S'pose," Rose said with a shrug.

"Would you like a jelly baby?" Jack read.

"Um…no," Rose said, completely confused.

"What would you change about the scarf?" Jack read.

"What scarf? I've never seen the Doctor wear any scarf! I wouldn't change anything about a scarf I've never seen."

Jack wrote that down.

Describe the first word that pops into your mind when you hear the names of these evildoers," Jack read. "Okay…Daleks."

"Scary," Rose said.

Jack wrote that down.

"Cybermen," he said.

"Intimidating," Rose said.

Jack wrote that down.

"Sutekh," he read.

Rose frowned.


Jack shrugged and wrote down her response. He read the next name.


"I don't know who that is," Rose said, shaking her head.

"Omega?" Jack said, glancing at her after reading it.

"Nope, don't know that one either."

"Zygons?" Jack said hesitantly.

"No," Rose said with an exasperated sigh.

"Um…Weng Chiang?"

"No, I don't know that one either. What the hell kind of survey is this?"

"Just something the Doc wanted answered," Jack said. "Okay, next question. Is the length of the scarf a distraction to you?"

"WHAT BLEEDIN' SCARF?" Rose said, throwing up her hands. "This whole survey is pants. I don't know what scarf he's talkin' about!"

"Don't look at me, I just do what the Doc wants," Jack said. "Next question. Why do you insist on wearing a skimpy leather outfit when I want you to wear proper clothes?"

"What? I don't wear leather outfits. Are you sure the Doctor wanted you to do this or is this your idea of a joke?"

"Just doing what the Doctor asked," Jack said with a shrug. "Next question, does the curly hair look good on me?"

Rose gave him a blank look.

"Next question, does the scarf go with my coat?"

Jack gasped when Rose snatched the clipboard from his hands. She told him to follow her and Jack got up and followed her back to the console room.

Inside the console room, the Doctor was under the console doing repairs. He flinched when Rose threw the clipboard on the grating beside him, making a loud SLAP when it hit. The Doctor slid out from under the console with a quizzical look on her face.

"This survey of yours is stupid!" Rose said, pointing to the clipboard. "What's all this rubbish about a scarf? You don't wear a scarf. And leather outfits and people I've never heard of. Is this a joke?"

The Doctor picked up the clipboard and studied the questionnaire.

"Oh blast, this is an old questionnaire. I grabbed it by accident. I used this one back in my forth life. My apologies, Rose," he said, getting up from the grate.

"Um…no worries. Just wondered why you were doing this in the first place?" Rose said.

"Well, occasionally, I run a survey just to make sure my companions are happy. I want them to be happy. Are you happy?"

"Yes, for the most part," Rose said.

The Doctor looked at her answers.

"Yes, well, the deaths can't be helped. Sorry about that," he said as he read her answers. "And the torture and hunting and nearly being killed. All goes with the job. But apart from that, you're happy here?"

"Yes," Rose said.

"Brilliant. Well, that's all I wanted to know. Thank you, Harkness, for doing this for me and Rose, glad you're happy here."

"What is the scarf thing?" Rose said.

"Forth life, wore a long scarf. I s'pose I was a bit self-conscious about it back then. Anyway, thanks for cooperating. You can go back to whatever you were doing before."

"Um…okay, I'll see you later then, Doctor."

"See ya," the Doctor said, sitting back down on the grate.

Jack watched while Rose turned and walked to the back door. They waited until she was gone and then the men giggled.

"You're bad, sometimes," Jack said.

"Nah, I gotta keep her on her toes with all these random questions. Besides, I love her answers, thanks for being a part of the joke."

"No problem. Love to tease Rose whenever I can. See ya later then?"

"Later, Jack."

Jack took the clipboard from him and left the room while the Doctor slid back under the console.

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