PARENTHOOD
Chapter Eighty Four "Right, into the tub with you," Adam said when he picked up a three year old David and gently plopped him into the warm water. David was covered head to toe in mud as he looked up at Adam and Adam arched an eyebrow at him. "Hey, don't look at me like that. YOU were the one that got all mucky and icky!" "But Chris pushed me in the puddle," David sighed as he swatted at the bubbles and Adam knelt down on his knees then leaned against the tub, placing his chin on his arm. "And now he's getting a bath, too." "Nuh-unh!" David said as he shook his head and Adam frowned, giving him a confused look. "Oh, Alan, may I have a word with you?" Adam thought then felt Alan coming into his mind. "What's wrong?" Alan asked. "Is Chris getting a bath after he and David decided to mud wrestle?" "Nah, just washed him off with a hose then let him go." "See?" David said when he held his arms up and Adam nodded. "So you don't mind him being all smelly and covered in germs?" Adam said when he felt Chris' mind pop into his head and smiled. "I'm covered in germs?" Chris thought when Adam gave David a wink and David giggled. Suddenly Adam appeared in their heads and was wearing a white lab coat, a blue suit, a white shirt, red converse sneakers and a red bowtie and his glasses. Behind him was a chalkboard as he stood in front of it and placed his hands behind his back. "What's with the bowtie?" Alan asked when he walked to him and Adam gave him a smug look. "Bowties are cool," Adam said and smiled. Alan darted behind the blackboard then came back wearing a red fez and leaned against Adam. "Wrong, Old Stinky Winky, fezzes are cool!" he said and Adam smacked it off his head. "Hey!" "Bowties beat fezzes hands down!" Adam said when Alan ran after the rolling fez and the boys giggled. "Now, where was I? Oh, right, germs!" Adam walked to the blackboard when he picked up the chalk then wrote on the blackboard. Germs was written in big letters as he tapped the blackboard and Alan walked toward him, wiggling his hips with his arms over his head and was swinging his hands side to side. "Do-pa-doo, this is my funky monkey dance!" he said as he danced around Adam and Adam folded his arms over his chest, rolling his eyes. "Want a banana?" Adam asked when he pulled the banana out of his pocket and tossed it to Alan. "Ooo!" Alan said when he ran off to get the banana and the boys laughed. Walking to the blackboard, Adam picked up the pointer and tapped it on the blackboard. "Now, let's get back to what I was talking about," Adam said when he drew two little cartoon boys wearing towels and one had DAVID written under it and CHRIS was written under the other one. The cartoon boys blinked when he made cartoon germs and the cartoon germs growled at him. "Those are scary, Daddy," David said and Adam blinked as he broke the connection then placed David's head in his hands, putting his forehead against David's forehead. "They're just drawings, Bump, they can't hurt you," Adam said softly and David smiled, placing some bubbles on the tip of Adam's nose. Wiping the bubbles away, he softly laughed then appeared next to Alan and Alan was writing ADAM IS A STINKY HEAD on the blackboard. Coughing, Adam pointed to the eraser and Alan erased what he wrote then walked away. "Right," Adam said then went back to the blackboard and placed his hands behind his back. "Now, as you can see, these germs are scary and love to nibble on..." "...I'm the baby...Gotta love me...Big purples eyes...I'm very cuddly," Alan sang as he walked toward Adam and dropped the banana peel on Adam's head. Sighing, Adam took the banana peel off his head and tossed it into the air, snapped his fingers and the banana peel vanished. "Excuse me," he said as Alan stopped, turned around and rocked back and forth on his heels. "Yes, may I help you?" he asked. "Would you mind telling me why you are interrupting me while I am trying to explain why it's necessary for them to take a bath?" he asked and Alan walked to him, placed his elbow on Adam's shoulder and smiled at him. "Well, it's because you are going to get too technical with them." "I was not." "Then why are you dressed like Doctor Germfree?" he said, pointing to Adam's outfit. "I...ah...um..." Adam said then sighed, walking around the blackboard and came back wearing a t-shirt, jeans and white converse sneakers. "Is this better?" "Oh, yes, much better!" Alan said, smacking his hands together. "Right," Adam said when he looked at the blackboard then noticed that one of the cartoon germs wasn't on the blackboard. "Ok, where did it go?" A large green cartoon germ in the shape of a circle with little hairs around it and big blue eyes bounced up and down from behind the blackboard and the boys giggled. "It's behind the blackboard, Uncle Adam!" Chris said as they walked to the blackboard then looked behind it but the cartoon germ had rolled around to the other side of the blackboard and bounced up and down. "It's in front of the blackboard now, Daddy!" David shouted as they turned around but the cartoon germ rolled behind the blackboard again and Alan scratched the top of his head. Suddenly the cartoon germ bounced up and down and stuck its pink and yellow tongue out at them. "It's behind the blackboard again!" Chris shouted when Alan held up a finger and walked away. He came back with two large cartoon hammers when he handed one to Adam and Adam smiled. Cartoon running music played as they ran around the blackboard and chased the cartoon germ. Alan sat on the floor as he panted then got up and chased after the cartoon germ. They chased it when it bounced into the air and Adam ran off, leaving Alan to chase after the cartoon germ. He came back with a bow and arrow when he took aim and fired the arrow. The arrow hit the cartoon germ when it popped like a balloon and slowly swirled in circles as it fell to the ground. It vanished after hitting the ground as they looked at the blackboard and the other cartoon germs looked at them with scared looks on their faces. "Right, is anyone else going to get snarky with me?" Adam said and the cartoon germs shook back and forth then ran off the blackboard. Handing the bow to Alan, Adam drew a bathtub filled with bubbles and some of the bubbles flew into the air. "Now, we all know that it's a good idea to take a bath but do you know why?" "It's because we're all smelly and dirty and no one likes a smelly belly?" David asked. "Correct!" Adam said with a grin and Cartoon David walked to the tub and slid the cartoon curtain around the tub. It moved the curtain back and was sitting in the tub, playing with the bubbles. "And you can play with toys in the tub and Mommy won't get mad," David said when Cartoon David held up a toy submarine and dropped into the bubbles. Suddenly a siren sounded as a periscope came out of the bubbles, looked around and a cartoon eye winked at them. "All clear, Sir!" Alan's voice said when the periscope lowered into the bubbles and Adam looked at Alan. "Ah, yeah, now, it is important to wash your whole body, starting with the toes," Adam said and Cartoon David started washing its toes when a cartoon shark fin appeared in the bubbles and the theme to Jaws started playing. Adam took the eraser when he erased the cartoon shark fin and tossed the eraser at Alan. "What, you never heard of tub sharks?" he asked and Adam puffed out his cheeks, sighing. "Now I see why Chris doesn't want a bath," he whispered then looked at the blackboard. Cartoon David was using a fishing pole when the fishing pole bent down and it began to reel in something. Suddenly a large cartoon fish with green and blue scales appeared as it yelped and the cartoon fish snapped at it. Adam erased the fish while Cartoon David panted and its cartoon heart thumped in its chest. "Daddy, this is getting scary again," David said when Adam broke the connection and stroked David's hair. "Do you want me to stop?" he asked but David shook his head and Adam kissed the top of his head. "Where did you go?" Alan asked when Adam came back and walked to the blackboard. "Had to check on something," he said then looked at the blackboard and Cartoon David was whistling as it cleaned one cartoon leg then the other one. "Now, having a clean bottom is also important, so wash that, too." The cartoon curtain wrapped around the tub as the shadow of Cartoon David stood up and they giggled, watching it use the scrub brush to wash its bottom. The cartoon curtain moved back and Cartoon David was sitting back under the bubbles. "Now it's time to wash the rest of the body, minding to scrub behind the ears," Adam said as Cartoon David started washing its body, arms, hands, neck, face and ears when one of the ears fell off and fell into the tub. "What?" Alan said when Cartoon David reached into the water, flicked the water off its ear and placed it back on. Sticking its tongue out at Alan, Cartoon David finished washing and Adam smiled. "Don't forget to wash your hair or you'll get nits," he said and Cartoon David reached down and picked up the cartoon shampoo bottle. It started washing its hair then rinsed the cartoon shampoo but had a bald head afterwards. Cartoon David glared at Alan when it pointed to its head and snapped its fingers. "Well?" Adam said while he tapped his foot and Alan sighed, drawing hair on Cartoon David's head. "Now, after the bath is done, it is time to dry off." The cartoon curtain appeared when they watched the shadow of Cartoon David stand up and used the towel to dry off. Tiny squeaking sounds filled the air as the boys giggled and the cartoon curtain moved back to show Cartoon David wearing a small cartoon dressing gown and bunny slippers. Little yellow lines surrounded Cartoon David and it smiled at them. Suddenly the periscope appeared in the tub as Cartoon David held up a cartoon torpedo and dropped it into the tub. BOOM appeared over the tub when a tattered white flag appeared and waved back and forth. The boys giggled as Adam laughed and Alan shrugged, smiling. "So, Chris, do you want to take a bath or be a smelly belly?" Adam asked. "I want a bath, Daddy," Chris said and Alan nodded, walking away. Adam broke the connection when he looked at David and David smiled at him. "That was funny, Daddy," David said as Adam ruffled his hair then picked up the shampoo bottle and started to wash David's hair.
Back Home Doctor Who Main Page Next