PARENTHOOD
Chapter One Hundred and Eighty Five The soft sound of the stick on the pavement sounded like a soft heartbeat while Hamish walked onward and pushed the sunglasses up his nose. Living most his life in the dark made him question what was real and what wasn't real and having his sight restored made things even more unreal to him at times. Sighing, he stopped near the light pole as he held the stick tightly in his hands and blinked. He didn't regret Compassion's gift, but he did wish that she had made it possible for his sight to return in steps. He had read that some people who regain their sight go from dark to light to seeing black shapes and white light to blurry shapes to colors to seeing images, but she had given him total sight in one go. "Aye, she did, but you didnae complain when it happened," he sighed then leaned on the light pole and crossed one ankle over the other. Shrugging his shoulders, he walked down the pavement when he walked up the walk to his house and he stopped, looking at the house. He never saw the house he lived in as a child, or the one that he had bought with Lucy, but he knew every inch of each one and could find the stairs with his eyes closed. Closing his eyes, he clicked the stick on the walk as he headed for the stairs when the tip of the stick clicked against the bottom step and he smiled. Keeping his eyes closed, he walked up the stairs when he held his hand out and touched the wood of the door. He moved his fingers over the door when the door opened and he nearly fell forward. Lucy grabbed onto him when she looked at him and he sighed, blinking his eyes open. "Hamish, are you alright?" she asked as he walked by her and she closed the door. "Aye," he said with a nod of his head then walked to the stairs and went upstairs. Walking down the hallway, he walked into his bedroom when he placed the stick against the wall and headed for the bed. Sitting down on the foot of the bed, he placed his head in his hands as he looked at his feet and blinked. He slumped into the bed while he looked up at the ceiling when he felt like he was being watched and sat up, looking at the doorway. His daughters, Zoe and Moira, stood in the doorway and he waved for them to come closer. Zoe was four and Moira was only a baby when Jamie had brought them to New Gallifrey and Hamish was amazed how easily they adjusted to living not only in a different time but another planet and he sadly smiled at them. "Are you alright, Daddy?" six year old Moira asked as she climbed onto the bed and placed her head against his arm. Ten year old Zoe stood in front of him as he looked at her light brown hair and hazel eyes and she blinked. "Aye, I'm alright, mo leannans," he said then slumped onto the bed and looked at the ceiling. The girls climbed onto the bed and snuggled on either side of him. Hamish placed his hands behind his head as he sighed and Moira placed her head on his chest. "Daddy, Zoe told me that we didnae always live in this house. Is she fibbing?" Moira asked and Hamish softly laughed. "Nay, leannan, she's telling the truth." "What did the house look like?" "He doesnae ken what it looked like, Goober Head, he was blind then!" Zoe said and Hamish glared at her. "Zoe Emily McCrimmon, that was uncalled for! You apologize right now!" he said. "I'm sorry," she said and Moira nodded. "It is true that I didnae ken what the house looked like, but I could always find my way around when I had tae go from one room tae the other. Tae be honest, there are times I wish that I was blind again so I wouldnae feel so...lost," he sighed and rubbed his eyes with his fingers. "I ken how you could be blind again!" Moira said as she got off the bed then walked to the dresser and opened the top drawer. She took out one of his dress ties as she walked back to the bed and Hamish sat up, watching her get onto the bed. She moved behind him when she slid the thickest part of the tie over his eyes and he held it in place. He had closed his eyes as she tied the tie tightly over his eyes and he smiled. He was once more in the dark as he reached his hand out and Zoe took his hand. She helped him off the bed while Moira went to get his stick and placed the stick in Hamish's hand. He thumped the stick on the floor as he nodded his head and held his hand out. He walked toward the door when the end of the stick hit the door and he placed his hand on the door. He headed into the hallway while the girls followed behind him and he tapped the end of the stick on the top of the stairs. He reached for the handrail as he went down the stairs and the girls followed him. "Eh?" Lucy asked as she saw them coming down the stairs and Hamish tapped the end of the stick on the bottom step. He stepped down as he smiled and Lucy walked closer, taking hold of his hand. "What are you doing?" "Daddy wanted tae be blind again," Moira said as Lucy reached for the tie but Zoe shook her head and Lucy lowered her hands. "And how long is he going tae have tae walk around with a bright blue tie wrapped around his head?" Lucy asked as she smiled and Hamish frowned, sticking his lower lip out. "It's bright blue?" he asked. "Aye, it's the one that Zoe gave you for Christmas," Lucy said and Hamish handed the stick to Zoe and untied the tie. He blinked his eyes open when he looked at the tie and laughed, shaking his head. "It was the first one I saw," Moira said as he looked down at her and smiled. "Well, it was a good idea at the time, but I just have tae live with the fact that I can see," he said and Moira slid her arms around his waist. "Then why do you want tae be blind?" Zoe asked, folding her arms over her chest. He remembered how happy she looked when he saw her for the first time and he reached over, stroking her hair. "I guess it's because I was blind for so long that seeing scares me. Living in the dark was all I knew." "Can I be blind, Daddy?" Moira asked as he looked at her and blinked. He turned then ran up the stairs and the girls looked at Lucy. A few minutes later Hamish came down the stairs with four black ties and walked to Moira, kneeling down in front of her. He tied the tie over her eyes as she smiled and he stood up, patting her head. He went back up the stairs then came down with three sticks and two of them were child size. He tied a tie over Zoe's eyes then Lucy's eyes when he tied the last one over his eyes and the blackness returned to his world. He had handed the sticks to Lucy and the girls when he fumbled for the stick and picked the stick off the couch. "Right, are we ready tae go out?" he asked and Lucy reached out her hand for him. He had set up a privacy block so she and the girls couldn't find him and felt Lucy's hand on his. He took her hand as she smiled and Hamish thumped the stick on the carpet. He jumped when he heard three more thumps and wondered if they had taken the ties off. "No cheating." "We're nae cheating," Zoe said. "Then I need you tae set up privacy blocks so you cannae see with your mind," he said and Lucy and the girls set up privacy blocks, waiting for him to tell them what to do next. "Now what do we do?" Moira asked. "Well, first we have tae pray that Mummy didnae close the door or this is going tae hurt," Hamish said with a grin and thumped the stick on the carpet. He headed for the door while hearing the soft thump of the other sticks behind him and he held his hand out, reaching for the door. He felt the wood of the door when he opened the door and reached down for the door handle. Opening the door, he led the way as the stick clicked on the porch and he headed for the steps. He waited while the girls and Lucy came closer and Lucy nearly slammed into his back. Smiling, he reached behind him as he took her hand and squeezed her fingers. Tapping the stick on the top of the step, he went down the stairs as he heard the sticks clicking behind him and he held his hand out. Lucy took hold of his hand as he heard the smaller sticks clicking at either side of him and he reached out with his hand, feeling first the top of Zoe's head then Moira's head and smiled. "Right, let's go." The sticks clicked on the pavements as Hamish led the way and Lucy had come to walk next to him, their sticks clicking in harmony with each other. The smaller sticks clicked behind them as Hamish felt his hearts swelling and reached out his hand, taking Lucy's hand in his. "This is fun, Daddy," Moira said when he stopped short and she smacked into him. "Daddy, is that you?" "Aye, but this isnae a game, this is how I saw the world," he said then yelped when she smacked his bottom and he reached behind him, trying to grab her hand. Moira giggled when he grabbed her hand and turned around, carefully kneeling down in front of her. "How did you do that if you cannae see?" "You were right in front of me," she said with a grin and he smiled, shaking his head. Reaching out, he tickled her as she yelped and tried to swat his hands away. "Um, don't mind me, but what are you lot doing?" Alan asked while he walked closer and Hamish carefully stood up, holding the stick tightly in his hands. "Daddy's showing us what it's like tae be blind," Zoe said as Alan arched his eyebrows up and stroked his chin. "I always wondered what it was like to be sightless. Hold on!" he said as Hamish shrugged his shoulders and sighed. A few minutes later Alan came out of his house with a bright green tie with cartoon frogs on it and a hockey stick and he placed the hockey stick in Hamish's hands. "Right, all I have to do is tie this around my eyes and I'll be ready!" Alan said as he tied the tie over his eyes and reached out for the hockey stick. He took the hockey stick in his hand as he smiled and tapped the hockey stick on the pavement. "Now what do we do?" "You have tae set up a privacy block so you cannae cheat an' see with your mind," Moira said. "Ah, good idea," Alan said when he set up a privacy block and reached out his hand. He felt Lucy's shoulder when she reached up and patted his hand. Alan tapped the stick on the ground when they started walking down the pavement and Hamish softly smiled. By the time they had gotten to the Doctor's house, they had been join by Adam, John, Julie, Donne, Jenny, Tara, Dorothy, Elizabeth, James, Jamie, Frazer, Angel, Christopher, Zoe, Donald, David, Faith, Cameron, Jack, Ianto and some of the others and they had ties covering their eyes. "What?" the Doctor asked when he walked out onto the porch and Hope stood next to him. "What are they doing, Daddy?" she asked as they walked down the stairs and headed toward the others. Hamish clicked the stick against the Doctor's converse sneakers when Hamish stopped and the others nearly crashed into each other. "Why are we stopping?" Adam asked, reaching out with his hand. "Well, I think it's because I'm standing in the way," the Doctor said when Rain came out of the house and walked toward him. "What's going on?" she asked and Moira reached out her hand as the small stick clicked on the pavement. Rain reached her hand out as she took Moira's hand and Moira smiled. "We're being blind like Daddy," she said and Rain looked at Hamish. "And why does Daddy want to be blind?" she asked when she saw that Namid was one of the ones wearing a tie over her eyes and Rain shivered. Of all of them, she was surprised that Namid would voluntarily become blind again and the Doctor felt her concern, looking at her, "Why is Namid doing this? She knows better than the rest of them what it was like to be blind," Rain thought. "I think that's exactly why she's doing it," he thought when Hamish reached out his hand and the Doctor took his hand. "Doctor, can you do me a favor?" Hamish thought as he lowered the privacy block and the Doctor wrapped his fingers around Hamish's fingers, lightly squeezing them. "What is it?" "Can you show me what's behind me?" "But I thought you didn't want to see." "Aye, there are times that I wish that Compassion didnae give me my sight, but I really want tae ken what this blind train looks like," Hamish thought with a smile and the Doctor giggled, nodding his head. He gently placed his fingers on Hamish's temples when he showed him what was behind him and Rain caught the stick when Hamish let go of the stick and reached up, removing the tie from his eyes. Blinking his eyes clear, Hamish turned around when he looked at the others and covered his mouth with his hands. His body shook when he walked to Lucy then removed the tie and she blinked her eyes open. Hamish uncovered Zoe and Moira's eyes when they blinked their eyes as he pointed behind them and they turned around. He hushed the girls as they looked at the others and the Doctor held onto Rain. Hamish took the stick from Rain when he tapped it hard on the pavement and the others looked toward him. "Och, I never thought I would be so happy tae see, but this...all of this...only shows me just how much all of you care aboot me. I ken that being able tae see if something that I have tae get used to, an' have been getting used tae, but all of you dinnae have tae cover your eyes to show me that it's better tae see the world then fumble around in the dark. So, go on, take the blinders off," he said as they removed the ties from their eyes and blinked. "Blimey, is this what it felt like when you got your sight?" Alan asked as he looked around then looked at Rose and smiled. "Whoa, you are beautiful!" "You didn't think I was beautiful before?" she asked, folding her arms under her breasts. "Oh yeah, but you're gorgeous now!" he said then picked her up and looked at the others. "If you all will pardon me, I am going to go ravage my gorgeous wife!" They laughed as Rose yelled for him to put her down as he ran down the pavement and the others walked away. Lucy walked to Hamish as she slid her arms around his waist and placed her head on his arm. The Doctor led Rain and Hope back into the house as Hamish looked at Lucy and his daughters and felt his hearts soaring. Scared as he was, Hamish realized how lucky he was when he took the stick from Zoe then thumped it on the pavement and the girls stood straighter, holding the small sticks in their hand. Nodding, he took Lucy's hand as the sticks clicked on the pavement and Hamish smiled, swinging Lucy's hand back and forth.
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