PARENTHOOD
Chapter Two Hundred and Nine The Doctor was led to a hut where he was allowed to change for his battle. As he was changing, Rain and Hope looked inside the hut. The Doctor had stripped off his clothes and was now wearing a breechclout with a painted frog on the front of it and an iron breastplate. Behind him were a spear and a leather shield that also had a frog painted on the front. Hope walked up to the breechclout and pointed at it. "Froggy," she said. "Yeah, brilliant, isn't it? I imagine it's my battle icon that I take into this battle with me. Got one on me shield as well." "Are you going to be alright?" Rain asked, putting her hand on his breastplate. "Yeah, I'll be fine. You see those frogs. This whole thing'll be over with in two seconds flat. Just watch me. I'll show those frogs they can't marry me off to one of their own." "Yeah, cause I get to marry you next," Hope said. The Doctor bit his lip to hold the laughter in while Rain rolled her eyes. "Blimey, everyone wants to marry me, I'm extremely popular," the Doctor said, tousling Hope's hair. He looked up when Rose, Jack and Alan came into the hut. "So, got a look at my opponent yet?" the Doctor asked them. "Nope, just watching while the entire village goes berserk," Jack said. "Half the people are excited about this fight, the other half are angry. I have a feeling there'll be frog's legs tonight if they don't simmer down." "Not my fault, I tried to end this rubbish peacefully but no, King Froggy had to have his marriage or his gladiatorial games, come hell or high water, so here I am now, suiting up for something that'll probably take ten seconds or less just so we can leave here in one piece," the Doctor said. "I would do this for you, but I have a feeling they won't be fooled by the switch," Alan said, pointing to his jet black hair. "Nah, it's not your place to fight my battles, Brother," the Doctor said. "You need to help keep everyone safe until I'm finished." "I'll fight them, Daddy," Hope said. "Absolutely not, that is out of the..." He paused and bent over. Everyone giggled when he held up her arm and pinched her muscle before looking her over. "Nah, too scrawny, I'll handle it," he said while Hope giggled. He walked over, grabbed the spear and shield and slid his arm through the rawhide straps in the back of the shield. Hope walked over and pointed to the front of it. "Another froggy," she said. "Rrrrrr, I'm a big, bad warrior who likes to kill!" the Doctor growled at her. Hope gazed up at him quietly for a moment while the Doctor tried to look menacing. "See, Daddy, the froggy here is the same as the froggy on your clothes," Hope said, pointing to the shield. "Rrrrr, kill!" the Doctor snarled at her. "Nah, you're doing it wrong," Alan said, walking up to him. "Allow us to demonstrate. Jack?" Jack gave him a blank look while Rose and Rain giggled. "Yes?" Jack said. "Come, show us your warrior spirit and menace the child. Here, let me start. HOW-EEEEEEEEEEE!" he shrieked as he thrust his arms out. He took the spear from the Doctor's hand and began to stomp around in a circle while he chanted like an Indian. Jack looked at Rain and Rose who were watching him expectantly. "Come on, Warrior, show us your spirit," Rain said to him. Jack shrugged and began to stomp around while Alan thrust the spear up above him and shrieked out "LOO-LAY-LOOOOO" By now, a small crowd of curious frogs was forming at the door while they watched them. Suddenly, Jack burst into song as he stomped around. "I am a big, old stud. I like to kill, I'm out for blood. I'll push your face into the mud and kill you till you're dead!" "Which in your case would take an eternity," the Doctor said dryly. "Okay, Geronimo and Sitting Bull, you can stop now before you bring the entire village in here." "Which one's which?" Alan asked, stopping. "I'm Sitting Bull," Jack said as he stopped. "That's a sexier, more masculine name. Actually, Alan's Indian name needs to be Put In Straitjacket." "Yours needs to be Why Won't You Die?" Alan countered as he gave his brother back his spear. "My Indian name's Fluffy," Hope said. Rain giggled when Alan and Jack stared at her. "Okey-dokey, Fluffy, I think this is our cue to get out of here so big chief Doctor Kills Them Frogs Dead can finish getting ready. Come along." The Doctor bent over and kissed Hope. He then kissed Rain before Rain took her daughter's hand and everyone left the hut. Once they were outside, they asked the frogs where the battles was taking place and they led them out of the village along a dirt path through the swamps to a large clearing. In the clearing, fallen tree trunks had been piled up to make a square space where the battle would take place. Some of the frogs sat on top of the tree trunks but the Doctor's family leaned against one pile of tree trunks that was chest high and waited. Eventually, the Doctor was led to the clearing by a couple of the female frogs from the hatchery. He caught eyes with his family and grinned. Hope stared to run to him but was quickly intercepted by Rose. She whispered in Hope's ear before helping her to sit on top of the logs. The Doctor waved when his daughter waved at him and he went over a low pile of logs and entered the arena with his spear and shield. While he waited, the other frogs from the village poured into the clearing and began to take up space around the arena while they watched the Doctor. "Well, where is my competition? Bring him or her on!" the Doctor yelled when no one else entered the arena. All the frogs suddenly bowed at the sound of a horn and a frog entered the clearing wearing a purple and gold tunic and carrying a wooden horn. Behind him were Swampdancer and Chloe. "My people, we are gathered here today to witness the contest between the Doctor and Bluebell! The winner will either marry my daughter or leave here peacefully. Bring in..." "Wait!" a male frog near the Doctor's family said, "you can't do this. It's not right! The Doctor's done nothing wrong!" The Doctor raised an eyebrow and grinned when half the frogs agreed with him. Swampdancer raised his hands and everyone fell silent. "The Doctor agreed to this contest," he said. "Yeah, only because you wouldn't let him walk out of here without marrying your daughter," Jack said. There was more grumbling but Swampdancer had his herald blow his horn to drown them out. "Bring in Bluebell and let the contest begin!" he yelled. The Doctor waited patiently, looking around for any sign of Bluebell. When he caught Hope's eye, she yelled to him and waved and he grinned as he waved back. Then out of the corner of his eye, he noticed something coming through the trees and he turned to face his foe. His mouth dropped open when he saw a small female frog riding a gigantic iguana-like creature. The creature had green and yellow skin and a frill behind its head that was the same colors. Bluebell rode on a large saddle on its back while she held on to the reins. In her hand was a spear similar to the Doctor's spear. The Doctor pointed to the creature as Bluebell rode the lizard up over the tree trunks and into the arena. "Wait a tic, where's my lizard thingy?" he said to Swampdancer. "I should have a lizard thingy as well!" "Arturo is Bluebell's steed," Swampdancer said. "She owns him and has the right to ride him into combat. Besides, it'll make the contest more interesting. Now...let the battle begin." The Doctor muttered a curse under his breath as he readied himself and turned to face Bluebell.
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