SOMETHING OLD, SOMETHING NEW
Chapter Eighty Two (One week later in Pete’s World…) After spending time in Tennessee and Kentucky, the three friends had entered Indiana and were making their way towards Indianapolis. Awinita was driving while Rose was stretched out and sleeping on the seat behind her. Alan was in the passenger seat reading a guidebook for Japan, trying to plan ahead. They were driving up interstate 65 from Louisville on a bright sunny day. Occasionally Alan would glance up and stare at traffic before turning his attention back to the book. “Find anything interesting?” Awinita asked him. “Lots of things. I think Japan is gonna be fantastic,” he said. “I also think we can leave the car behind and walk around the country the way we planned. If we need to hitch a ride we can always take the bullet train. They have railways to every major city which will save us time and money.” “I can’t wait,” Awinita said. “Me neither. China’s gonna be interesting as well. I took a look at the guidebook for it. There’s a lot of interesting cuisine I’d like to try out in both countries.” “Such as?” Awinita said. He grinned and reached behind him for the sack containing the guidebook for China. He found the book and opened it to a page he had flagged. “Listen to this,” he said. “This is in Beijing. It says…a visit to the Guolizhuang Restaurant in Beijing is not for the faint-hearted. Here the menu consists almost entirely of penis and testicle dishes — made from the private parts of deer, snakes, yaks, horses, seals and ducks, among others.” Awinita made a face. “You wanna eat at a penis restaurant?” she said. “I know you’re sex obsessed but that’s going a bit too far.” “Ah, come on, where’s your spirit of adventure? Rose has eaten worse, ask her when she wakes.” “Rose has eaten worse than snake penis?” “Mm-hmm.” “And did she eat this something worse than snake penis voluntarily or did the Doctor trick her into eating it?” “Well, um…he might have fudged the facts a wee bit when he handed her the plate,” he said. “But most of the time she seemed to enjoy eating the food that he gave her to try.” “Yeah, well I’ll wait till Rose wakes up and get it straight from the horse’s mouth. Somehow I don’t quit believe that.” “There’s more to the passage though, listen to this. The platters have names like “The Essence of the Golden Buddha,” “Phoenix Rising,” “Jasmine Flowers with 1,000 Layers” and “Look for the Treasure in the Desert Sand.” Are such flowery names meant to prevent guests from prematurely running off? After all, the “jasmine flowers” are made of layers of thinly sliced donkey penis, and the “treasure in the desert” is actually sheep gonads on a bed of curry. Chinese eat anything with four legs, except tables. And everything that flies, except airplanes,” says Zhaoran, quoting a well-known Chinese saying. This may be true, but even in China a penis restaurant is unusual. The Guolizhuang restaurant opened two years ago on the aptly-named Dongsishitiao Street. Word quickly spread among well-heeled Chinese, and today there are five franchises. The chain is even expanding outside of China — into the Chinatown in Atlanta, Georgia.” “Gee, it sucks that we forgot to go to the penis restaurant when we were in Atlanta,” Awinita said, dryly. “You really wanna do this?” “Indeed, I do. And that’s not the only exotic thing I wanna sample. Asians eat a wider variety of foods and animal parts than people in the west do. Fancy trying fried seahorse or starfish on a stick, my friend?” “Um…not really,” she said. “Ooo and not only can you order penises there, you can also order deer and sheep fetuses,” Alan said with a wicked grin. “Ewwwwww,” she said as he laughed. “The night you go there, leave me back in the hotel room. I don’t want to sit there and watch you eat a deer fetus.” She grimaced. “Ugh, I’m gonna have that image in my head all night. Thanks, Alan,” she said. She frowned when the engine suddenly died and the speed began to drop. She stepped on the gas pedal a couple of times. “Oh crap,” she said. She coasted off onto the side of the road. She tried to start the car but the engine wouldn’t turn over. She sighed and looked at Alan. “Nice,” she said. “I suppose you don’t know how to fix a car?” “Not really, I know the names of car parts but I don’t know exactly what goes where,” he said. “Still, we can always take a look, I guess. Open the hood.” Awinita reached down and pulled the hood open lever while Alan got out. She looked back at Rose and gently shook her awake. “Huh?” Rose muttered. “Wake up, Rose, the car’s broke down.” Rose’s eyes snapped open and she sat up in the seat. “Where are we?” she said. “We’re almost to Indianapolis, I think.” “Where’s Alan?” She pointed to the raised hood. “He knows how to fix cars?” Rose muttered as she slid open the side door and got out. She walked around to the front. Alan had his arms folded on the front of the car while he peered inside. Rose walked up to him. “You know what’s wrong?” she said. “Absolutely no clue,” he said. “We were talking and the engine suddenly died on us, that’s as far as I know. I checked the oil and its fine and the water in the radiator seems to be alright.” “Well, I s’pose I’ll have to ring for a tow truck if I can find a number for one. I…” She trailed off and looked over when a white minivan suddenly slowed down and pulled off the road in front of them. It parked and a middle aged heavyset woman with graying hair got out of the car. “Do you need help?” she asked, walking over. “Do you know anything about cars?” Rose asked. “A little, I can take a look if you want,” she said. Alan and Rose backed up while she leaned over and stared at the interior. Rose looked over; saw the passenger door open and Awinita slide out. She shut the door and walked over to their sides. “Uh, your timing belt snapped,” the woman said, looking at them. “Is that bad?” Alan said. She shrugged. “No. You have to buy a new belt and have someone install it and the car will run again,” she said. “Are belts expensive?” Rose asked. “Not really, usually they’re between twenty and thirty dollars,” she said. Rose breathed a sigh of relief. “Do you happen to know the number for a tow truck?” she said. “I have AAA. They have a tow service,” the woman said. “Are you covered by AAA?” “Um, I don’t think so, this is a rental,” Rose said. “Oh, well let me call AAA anyway, I’m sure they’ll be able to help you or find someone who can,” she said. “I’d appreciate it,” Rose said. The woman went to retrieve her cell phone. “Guess we can take the car to Indianapolis and rent a room for the night,” Rose said, shrugging. “If that’s all that’s wrong with it, then we’ll only have to wait a day.” “Thank God that’s all that was wrong with it,” Awinita said. “Although I suppose you could have swapped it for another van.” They stood around talking while the cars on the interstate zoomed past. Several minutes later, the woman walked back to them. “AAA won’t do it because you’re not a member,” she said to Rose. “But they gave me the number of a tow service who would, so I called them for you.” “Thanks, we appreciate it…” “Margaret, Margaret Blass.” “Hi, I’m Rose Tyler, this is Alan Timelord and Awinita Harris,” she said, shaking her hand. She shook all their hands in return. “So, where do you guys live?” Margaret asked. “Well, Alan and I are from London and Awinita’s from North Carolina. We’re travelin’ across the country and headin’ towards Indianapolis.” “Do you have a place to stay?” “We were gonna get a hotel room for the night while the car’s in the garage,” Rose said. “Don’t do that. My neighbor works on cars, all you have to do is get the timing belt and he’ll put it on for you. Meanwhile, I can put you three up for the night at my house. Save you guys some money.” The three of them looked at each other. “You sure it’s not too much trouble?” Rose asked. “No trouble at all. My father lives with me, he’s 90 and a bit senile but that’s it. We live out in the country near Shelbyville. It’s not too far from here. And you can come with us into Shelbyville tomorrow. We usually eat lunch at a little diner and I can treat you guys to a meal. Afterwards, we’ll go get the belt and my neighbor can put it on and you’re on your way, how ‘bout it?” Rose looked at her friends. “What’d you guys think?” she said. “Up to you, you’re the one in charge,” Alan said. “I’m not a serial killer and neither is my dad,” Margaret said. “You have nothing to fear. Shelbyville isn’t that far from Indianapolis so you’ll be able to get back on the road.” Rose shrugged. “Alright, I think it’ll be a nice change of pace to spend the night in a proper house,” she said. “Thanks for offering.” “No problem. Now all we have to do is wait for the tow truck to get here and we’ll be on our way,” she said.
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