FRAGMENTS OF A DYNASTY
Based on the TV Show "Tudors"

Summary: Elizabeth suddenly realises how old she is and how alone she is now all her friends are gone.

Pairings: mother/daughter Kat/Elizabeth, father/daughter Cecil/Elizabeth, Elizabeth/Robert, implied Henry/wives, Tom Seymour/Katherine Parr, and Tom Seymour/Elizabeth.

She looks around her Court and is suddenly filled with terror.

She cannot recognise anyone.

They were all young beautiful girls and young men eager to fill their father's offices. None she had spent her life with. None that she knew every detail about. And worse of all none of them knew her well enough to give her that guidance she sorely needs.

Where was her chief lady in waiting Kat? Where was her beloved Robin? Where was her wise and steady Cecil? Where the hell are Walsingham, and the Parrys, and Aunt Anne of Cleves? Where were her cousins? Where were John Dee, Thomas Howard, and all those old familiar faces in the elderly nobles who had been fresh faced in her father's reign?

She misses them so very much even if she did not like many of them.

She misses Kat the most because she was the mother that Elizabeth never really got. Her own dead, Jane Seymour dead, Anne sent away, Kitty beheaded, and she lost any real chance she had with Katherine Parr when she allowed Tom Seymour to touch her. Kat was there for her through it all. She held her when she cried, put her to bed with a bed time story, taught her the basics of everything from manners to French, brushed her hair, told her off, and lied to the authorities when threatened with torture in the Tower. She was always there.

And then one day she wasn't and there was a great big gaping hole inside of her that can never be filled now.

She misses William Cecil who she trusts with everything. The man who spied for her on a regular basis, the man that warned her each and every time someone was plotting against her from the tender age of fourteen years old, the man that advised her on her spending and had no qualms with telling her off about her newest dress that was covered in jewels. He was the father she wanted. A man that looked after her regardless of what she had done or said. A man who went to the end of the world just for her. A man who was always proud of her. A man who held her in her desperate moments when she breaks down. A man who is always there.

And now he isn't and she misses him terribly. More than she had ever missed her own biological father. Then again Henry VIII can only boast about a handful of meetings with her and appointing Cecil as her accountant while Cecil was there all the time.

The worst bit of all was missing Robert Dudley. Her own true and only love. She had never loved another though she had felt strongly about several men. He had always been there somewhere from when they were children. her brother's classmate, her own friend, her contact in Court when she was exiled by her own brother, her comfort in the Tower, and then almost her Lover, Husband, and Father of her child if it hadn't been for all the scandal. Even when he was married to another woman he was still hers and she relished in having him in her heart and being in his. He gave her the largest cheer at Tilbury and the sweetest kiss on her hand for comfort. The next time she hears from him is his goodbye letter as he lied dying in his bed.

At least it was a peaceful death.

But the deaths continue all around her. All her old and dearest friends are disappearing fast and in their place are the next generation and they all watch her with vicious bright young eyes, eyeing up her old, wrinkled, creaky body in hopes that she'll drop dead soon and they would replace her with their favourite.

If this was a different life it would not matter because she would be joining her beloved husband and leaving the throne to either her eldest son or daughter. Perhaps a King Henry IX or a King Robert I or a Queen Anne I. She would be surrounded by children and grandchildren that she would not mind leaving.

Instead she sits alone in her throne barely being able to stand.

She has never felt so lonely before in her life.

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