LOSING AND FINDING DREAMS
OK this part I tried to stay true to the characters, I am not completely sure that I did, but here is my attempt. ~*~ Later that night/the next morning ~*~ Miss Parker lay in bed trying, unsuccessfully, to fall asleep. Broots's lawyer had contacted her to tell her that he was going to come to the hospital the next day to speak with her, Debbie and Sydney. She already had enough problems with lawyers as it was. She sighed in frustration and turned over onto her back, staring up at the ceiling. Just then the phone rang; she answered it. "When are you going to learn not to call me at an ungodly hour, Jarod?" Jarod chuckled. "What and miss the thrill of you accosting me while you are half asleep?" "Cute, Jarod, not funny, but cute," she told him. Jarod smiled at the old joke and then he became serious. "I am sorry about Broots." Miss Parker swallowed. "Aren't we all?" "How are you doing?" genuine concern in his voice. Miss Parker sighed and lay back again. "Fine I suppose." "You know that Syd would be glad to talk if you need to." Jarod paused for a moment. "He really does care for you like a daughter you know." Miss Parker's throat closed up. She reached over to her nightstand for a small framed photo; Jarod had gotten it off of a DSL and sent it to her a couple of weeks ago. She and Jarod were sitting on a step with Sydney sitting between them; they were sharing a small, slightly sad smile. She remembered that day; Raines had taken Angelo, known to them a Timmy at the time, away. She and Jarod had been devastated to lose their small, mysterious friend. Sydney had been talking to them, helping them through their grief, showing them that remembering all the good times they had with him helped lessen the pain some. "I know," she managed to whisper. She swallowed hard. "He really is both of ours father, isn't he? He is the father I never had and the father you only just recently found." "Yes." Jarod seemed to be struggling with similar emotions as well. "Have either of you talked to Debbie yet? You lost your mother when you weren't that much younger than she, being able to relate to someone could really help her through this." Miss Parker's throat became completely choked with emotion. "Miss Parker?" Jarod asked worriedly. "It hurts, Jarod." She finally managed. "Even after all these years, it still hurts so much." "It will always hurt, but I have found talking to others about it helps." Miss Parker reached up and wiped away a tear, she was slightly annoyed that she would breakdown with Jarod like this, but in a way it was comforting because he was someone she knew she could trust not to take advantage of this. "They say loss makes people deep," Jarod said quietly. Miss Parker gave a mirthless laugh. "Then you, Syd and I must be the deepest people in the world." "Yeah," Jarod answered in the same tone. He decided to change the subject. "How is the custody battle going?" Miss Parker rubbed a hand over her face. "Hell. Raines and Lyle are fighting for all their worth, but I think that the judge will side with me, he told me after the last meeting that he had never seen two less people less qualified to take care of a child than those two. He has allowed T.K. to stay with me at least until the custody battle is over." "I have been meaning to thank you for naming him for Kyle, my family is grateful and honored." "You don't need to thank me." She was slightly uncomfortable. "It seemed fitting to name him Thomas Kyle; they both lost their lives at Centre hands for those they loved. Besides it was just too demeaning having him called 'Baby Parker' I couldn't stand having my little broth - cousin - called something like that." Jarod understood her trouble adjusting to her new familial relationships. It was then Miss Parker's turn to change the subject. "Speaking of family how is Ethan?" Jarod relaxed more. "Great! He, JJ, Dad and Emily are getting along great. Emily is really glad to have the chance to get to know him better." "JJ?" "Sorry, that's Gemini, my clone." "How did you guys come up with JJ?" Miss Parker raised and eyebrow. "We did some looking through his files. Most of the time they referred to him as Gemini, but often they called him 'J2.'" "Jarod the second," Miss Parker muttered darkly. "Probably something along those lines, anyway, that is how JJ got the idea for his name, two J's." There was amusement in Jarod's voice. Miss Parker had to smile. "So he is what, 17 now?" "Yes. We celebrated his birthday last week." "Wish the kid happy belated birthday for me the next time you talk to him." Miss Parker smiled quietly then became serious. "So how is your search for you mother going?" Jarod reached over to his own nightstand and picked up the photograph of their two mothers together. "She covered her tracks more or less completely. I have been searching for any sign of her, but have yet to find any." Miss Parker glanced over at her own copy of the exact same photo. "I'm sorry." "Me too." Miss Parker then shifted her gaze to her clock and groaned. "How am I going to stay awake tomorrow?" Jarod chuckled lightly. "On that note I will let you go. Good night, Parker. Good luck at the meetings tomorrow." "'Night, Jarod," Miss Parker responded grumpily. They both hung up. Miss Parker gazed at the photos that sat on her bedside table, the one of her mother holding her in her arms as a baby; she, Sydney and Jarod; hers and Jarod's mothers together; and one of her knelt down next to T.K. hugging him, and him hugging back, big smiles on both of their faces. Just then she heard a small voice call from her doorway. "Mommy?" "Miss Parker looked up, the look on her face suddenly full of a tenderness few ever saw from her. Even though nothing was at all official and he had only been with her less than a month, he had taken to calling her that, but, as Sydney had pointed out, she was the first person to really take care of him and care about him, it just melted her heart every time he said it. "What is it T.K.?" "Mommy, I had a bad dream." "Do you want to stay here?" T.K. nodded his eyes wide. Miss Parker opened her arms, in a welcoming gesture. "Come here, buddy." The little three year-old boy eagerly crawled up on the bed and snuggled into Miss Parker's protective embrace. Miss Parker was forever amazed at how this little boy in no time at all had crawled around the ice walls that she used to protect her heart and settled in. She had been frightened at first by how strongly she cared for the little boy, but after talking to Sydney she decided to take his advice and just let it take her where ever it wanted to take her. Now she loved him as her own. "Mommy?" "Yes?" "Could you sing me a song?" Miss Parker gently smiled at him. " me ." She thought for a few moments trying to think of a good song to sing to him; she finally thought of one. "As the moon kindles the night, as the wind kindles the fog, as the rain fills every ocean, and the sun, the Earth, your heart will kindle my heart. Take my heart, take my heart, kindle it with your heart. And my heart cannot be kindled without you. With your heart kindle my heart." ~*~ The song came from The Little Princess, so I also don't own that, just so everyone knows and I don't get into trouble! I hope that this chapter was OK.
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