DOCTOR WHO SILLY STORIES

A/N: After spoofing Twilight, I decided to spoof a few more of my favorite fandoms, both old and new. I will put the name of the fandom before each vignette so people know what they are.

Chapter Seventy Nine

(Mystery Science Theater 3000…)

"Hello, Mike Nelson here on the Satellite of Love and today Gypsy is making her world famous pecan nut brownies for us." Mike said as he stood in front of a long counter that was in front of the Movie Sign door.

Gypsy slides into view of Cambot and a plate filled with square chocolate brownies slides along the counter in front of Mike.

"Yes, these are my brownies," she said in a high-pitched voice. "I am very proud of them. They won first prize in the Truth or Consequences Baking Competition in Truth or Consequences, New Mexico."

"Gypsy, when have you gone to New Mexico?" Mike asked her.

Gypsy gave him a blank look before suddenly looking over her shoulder.

"Oh! I hear the toaster!" she said. "My Eggo Waffles are done! Bye!"

"Wait, when did you visit New Mexico, Gyps?" Mike called out as she hurried away.

Suddenly, Crow the Robot popped up beside him.

"Mornin' Mike," he said.

"Mornin' Crow, how are you today?" Mike said to him.

"Well, I was in my room looking at the latest edition of Busty Bots With Bolts and Boobs and getting a really big erection as I was doing it," Crow said. "Unfortunately, the only girl bot here is Gypsy and I don't think she'll mate with me unless I pin her down and savagely rape her so I'm sorta stuck with a metal stiffie for the moment because I have nowhere to blow my wad. And I really don't wanna masterbate because my hand gets all sticky and gross afterwards. But that's my day so far, how about you?"

Mike stared at him for a moment, not knowing what to say to that before looking at Cambot and pretending his best friend didn't just speak about robot rape and masterbation.

"Anyway, Doctor Forrester hasn't contacted us today so we're just hanging out and now we're going to be eating brownies and…"

He trailed off when he heard a wheezing sound behind him.

"What tha?" Crow said as both of them turned around and saw a blue box materializing.

"Wow, that's freaky," Crow said as the door opened and a thin man with spiky hair stuck his head out.

"Hello," the man said. "I'm the Doctor."

"I'm Mike Nelson and this is my best friend, Crow T. Robot," Mike said. "Welcome to the Satellite of Love."

"The what?" the Doctor said.

"Satellite of Love," Mike repeated.

"Um…just a tick," the Doctor said.

He stuck his head back in the door and they heard him yell, "ROSE, KEEP JACK AWAY FROM THE DOOR. I LANDED ON SOME SATELLITE OF LOVE AND I HAVE A FEELING LOVE MEANS THE SORT OF LOVE THAT JACK ENJOYS!"

He stuck his head back out.

"Sorry," he said cheerfully. "I have friends in here."

"Must be very cramped," Crow said, leaning forward and looking at the side of the box.

"No, it's bigger on the inside, we have plenty of room," the Doctor said with a shrug.

"Yeah, so how did you get on board?" Mike said.

"Well, I'm a time traveler and this is my ship."

Mike and Crow looked at each other.

"Ship? As in spaceship?" Mike said excitedly.

"Yup. My TARDIS," the Doctor said, patting the door lovingly. "Stands for Time and…"

"To hell with what it stands for!" Crow said, cutting him off. "We can finally leave this place!"

"Oh? Are you trapped here then?" the Doctor said.

"No, we're visiting the first Disneyland in Outer Space; of course we're trapped here!" Crow said.

"Well, how should I know. I've never been here before," the Doctor said, annoyed, as he stepped outside and closed the TARDIS door.

"Don't mind Crow. He loves sarcasm," Mike said. "I'll explain, I had a predecessor named Joel that was sent here by Doctor Forrester, an evil scientist, who has a sidekick called TV's Frank. He sent Joel here as a test subject for his evil experiments and while Joel was here, he made Crow, Gypsy, Tom and Cambot. When he escaped from here, they needed a new test subject and I was temping for them at the time so they knocked me out and sent me here."

"Wait, you were temping for a mad scientist?" the Doctor said.

"Well, I'd been through a whole bunch of temp jobs and it was basically bottom of the barrel by that time," Mike said.

"And they experiment on you, this Doctor Forrest and Frank?" the Doctor said.

"Yes, they force us to watch crappy movies in the theater on board here so they can try to drive us insane," Mike said.

The Doctor gave him a long, hard look.

"He makes you watch crappy films," he finally said.

"Yeah, they're real stinkers," Crow said. "The worst of the worst."

"And why is he trying to drive you insane with this…experiment?" the Doctor said.

"Not sure exactly but we've managed to survive by making fun of the movies," Mike said proudly.

"Uh huh, that's…fascinating. Anyway, nice to meet you and…"

Just then, Tom Servo walked into the room.

"Hum de dum de dum," Tom said as he headed towards his friends.

He stopped when he saw the TARDIS and looked it over.

"Does this belong to anyone?" Tom said to Mike and Crow.

"Him," Mike said, pointing to the Doctor. "It's a spaceship and we can finally leave this hunk of junk for good."

"Aw, damn, I was gonna put it in my room. I like boxes," Tom said dejectedly.

"Never mind that, he can take us home now!" Mike said to Tom.

The Doctor was about to say something when he saw a red light flashing on the counter in front of Mike.

"Damn, it's Doctor Forester," Mike said, pushing a button.

The Doctor turned his attention to a large screen that popped up behind Cambot. Cambot turned and began to film it. The Doctor raised his eyebrow when he saw a man with wild brown hair, green glasses and a mustache and a blonde haired man that had styled his hair into a pompadour.

"Greetings Mike, bots and…odd fellow I don't know," the wild haired man said, studying the Doctor.

He looked at the man standing beside him.

"Are they having guests today, Frank?" he asked him.

"I don't think so," Frank said.

"Who is that?" the man said to Mike, pointing to the Doctor.

"I'm the Doctor," the Doctor said.

"Really? So am I! Mad doctor?" the man said.

"If you mean am I certifiable? No," the Doctor said.

"Fascinating. Anyway, I'm Doctor Forrester and you can just stand there and listen while I talk to Mike and the bots. Anyway…today, my test subjects, I have found a cinematic fart for you called Doctor Zeepot and the Lint People. Hope it doesn't scramble your brains too badly!"

The Doctor looked at Mike when Forrester and Frank laughed hysterically at that.

"This is your captor?" he said, pointing to Forrestor.

"Yeah, so…can you take us away from here?" Mike said.

"Wait? What?" Forrester said, cutting off his laugh.

"You heard me, Doctor F, this man is gonna take us far away from here and we'll never see your ugly face again and…MOVIE SIGN!" Mike yelled when lights suddenly went off and they heard a buzzing sound. The Doctor watched, shocked, as the three of them yelled, "WE'VE GOT MOVIE SIIIIGN!" as the theater doors slid open. Before the Doctor could say anything to them, the three of them were running down a long corridor, yelling like banshees that they had movie sign. He watched while door after door slid open in front of them until they reached a vault door at the end. The door slowly creaked open and they jumped through. The Doctor watched while the door closed behind them and locked and then he waited for them to come out. He waited and waited and after ten minutes of waiting, he shrugged his shoulders. He looked over his shoulder at Cambot.

"Tell them they missed their chance when they come back out," he said to him before he opened the door of his TARDIS and went back inside.

"Hey, wait!" Gypsy called from the kitchen as the TARDIS dematerialized. "You haven't tried my brownies yet!"

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