THE DOCTOR GETS SMART
Crossover of "Doctor Who" and "Get Smart"
Chapter Four 99 stared at him in disbelief. “What?” “I’m an alien.” The Doctor repeated. She looked over at Rose. “It’s the truth. He is.” She said. She looked at the Doctor. “Wait a moment, you can’t be. You look like us.” She protested. The Doctor shrugged. “My kind are humanoids.” He replied. “No, wait, I still don’t believe you are an alien. There is just no way you can be, right Max?” She glanced over and sighed when she noticed Max was beaming. “My husband on the other hand has no trouble believing in such things.” She added. Max stepped up to the Doctor. “This is incredible. I keep telling everyone aliens exist and here you are!” he said overjoyed. The Doctor smiled. “Yup, here I am.” He replied. Max spun around. “You know what this means, 99? I was right!” he said gleefully. He began to jump up and down repeatedly. “I was right! I was right! I was right!” he chanted as he hopped up and down. “Um, Max.” 99 said, trying to get his attention. “I was right! I was right! I was right!” “Max!” “I was right! I was right! I was…” “MAX!” Max stopped jumping. “What, 99?” “You’re jumping up and down on his feet!” 99 said, pointing down. Max turned around and saw the Doctor frozen in pain with his mouth wide open and his eyes bulging out. “Oh, eh, sorry about that.” He said sheepishly. “Not a problem.” The Doctor said in a strained voice. “Now could you step off my feet, please?” Max looked down and quickly stepped off his feet. The Doctor gasped and grabbed onto Rose as she led him over to the wall. Max cleared his throat nervously as the Doctor leaned against the wall and glared at him. “Anyway 99, isn’t this great! Finally proof of life on other planets!” Max said, overjoyed. “What proof, Max? He looks like us!” 99 said, pointing to him. “I can’t see anything alien about him at all!” “He has two hearts.” Rose said. 99 looked at her and then looked at the Doctor. “You do?” The Doctor nodded. “Two hearts! This just keeps getting better and better.” The Doctor’s eyes widened as Max hurried over to him. He quickly ducked behind Rose and positioned his feet directly behind hers. Max paused. “We don’t have a stethoscope though.” He said. He looked at 99. “Do you have a stethoscope in your purse, 99?” 99 shook her head. “Drat.” Max muttered. “Um…I have something that will help prove I’m an alien. But…” He paused. “You must swear never to tell anyone about it because if Siegfried learns about it he could use it to take over the world. So, promise me if I show you this proof you’ll keep your mouths shut.” “I promise.” 99 replied. The Doctor looked over at Max. “Promise?” He said to him. “You mean we can’t tell anyone at all?” Max whined. “No, you can’t tell anyone! It’s risky enough letting the two of you see my TARDIS as it is. I don’t want a whole mess of people finding out especially since planet Earth is at stake. So swear to me you won’t tell a soul or I’m not going to show it to you.” Max sighed. “Okay, I swear I won’t tell anyone.” He said dejected. “I just wish you’d let me show you to our Chief. I told him if I ever found an alien that I would bring it in to CONTROL headquarters so he would be convinced there was life on other planets.” “Well, I’m sorry but I draw the line at being a show and tell object.” The Doctor replied. “I’m sure your Chief is a good man, but I still don’t want to risk too many people finding out about me. So, you promise?” “I promise.” “Okay, well, follow us then and we’ll take you to our TARDIS.” He started to leave when Max stopped him. “Hold on, I have to call the Chief.” He held up his hands as the Doctor glared at him. “Not that. I have to tell him to send people over to pick up these KAOS agents so we can interrogate them.” He replied. The Doctor relaxed and nodded. He started to leave figuring Max would have to go outside and find a phone booth. He stopped and stared at him as Max took off his shoe. “What are you do…” he started to ask. He blinked in astonishment as Max turned the shoe over, twisted the heel and took the bottom off. He and Rose exchanged glances as Max dialed a number and put the shoe to his ear. “Hello Chief, this is agent 86.” He said into the shoe. “Bitchin’ I want one of those.” Rose said, nudging the Doctor. “Chief, 99 and I were able to infiltrate KAOS headquarters and…” He glanced at the Doctor and Rose. “We were able to subdue Shtarker and 3 other KAOS agents by ourselves, but…Siegfried got away.” He pulled the shoe away from his ear and grimaced as the Chief yelled at him. 99 rolled her eyes as Max gingerly put the phone back to his ear. “Yes, Chief, I know we shouldn’t have let Siegfried get away. But we were kinda busy defending ourselves, and well, look on the bright side, Chief, we have Shtarker now. We can interrogate him.” He listened for a moment and glanced over at the Doctor. “No, Chief, we weren’t able to find any aliens.” He said. The Doctor smiled his thanks as 99 beamed proudly at her husband. Max sighed. “Yeah, you’re right, Chief. There probably is no such thing as aliens. It’s just Siegfried imagining things.” He held the phone away from his ear. “See, I can keep secrets.” He said softly. He put the phone back to his ear. “What? Oh, nothing, Chief. I was just saying something to 99. But listen, I have to go. We can’t let Siegfried’s trail grow cold. I just wanted you to send some agents to pick up these men before they wake up.” Max paused and nodded. “Okay, I’ll keep you updated, Chief. Gotta go, bye.” He hung up the shoe phone, picked up the heel, put it back on and put his shoe back on. “Thank you.” The Doctor said gratefully. “Well, I did want to tell the Chief, but you’re right. Secrecy is essential right now and I can’t risk others knowing you’re an alien. Especially with Larrabee sitting right next to the Chief’s office. If anyone would blab, it would be him.” He slapped his hands together. “Well, let’s go see this…” He frowned. “TARDIS?” he said hesitantly. “Yes, TARDIS is what I call my ship. It stands for Time And Relative Dimension In Space.” “Wow, sounds impressive.” Max replied. “Oh it is very impressive. Just follow me and Rose and we’ll show you where it is.” Max nodded. He grabbed 99’s hand and they followed them out of the building. As the door shut behind them; Shtarker opened his eyes and raised his head up. “Zo, that von man is an alien, eh? I vill follow them and zee this TARDIS for myself. And then, when ve have captured the alien and his machine and done away vith the Shmarts, KAOS vill finally rule the vorld!”
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